Stuff

Lots of stuff has happened since the last time I posted anything. The day after that last post there was a bomb threat and the whole school had to walk up to the vocational school field. That sucked! But what was worse was who did it. My best friend, the man I love with all I have, everybody knows anyway but it was Justin. It was soooo an accident. He was at the golf range in Wellness 3 and he was showing off his new cell phone that he got the night before from his grandmother for a birthday present and his friend Mitch goes "hey can you call 911?" and he goes "I don't know" so they dial it and hang up quick. They tried it one more time and just hung up and then the third time Mitch goes "Hey say you have a bomb at Cony" and Justin did. He is such an idiot. He doesn't think strait and now his life is gonna be ruined because of one stupid retarded mistake. He makes me so mad sometimes but I love him soooo much. Now he just stays home all day and plays video games. He will probably go to jail too and he asked me if he goes to jail will I write to him and I was like of course. Everything was getting to be so extremely perfect. We were getting to be best friends and him being at school with me was one of the only things keeping me going. We are best friends. I was one of the first two friends he told. First he told Kyle then he told me next and he told me that if I told anybody he would never speak to me again ever but I guess Kyle told people because almost everybody knows now. I'm even scared to go to school (not because of bomb threats and stuff) because what if I go to school and when I come home he's gone off to jail or some special school and his parents move and I never see him ever again and I don't think I could stand that if it happened. I'd probably go crazy and kill myself I love him so much! We both were gonna do so much better this year in school because last year was such a waste to both of us. He was gonna help me out with my math and I was gonna help him in English. All kinds of things make me cry too. Like peas (I ate peas at his house once) and carrots (I ate carrots on his porch once) and golf (obviously) and pizza pockets (I gave him one during lunch and I will never be able to again cause he wont be there) and my CD player says Risk on it which is the name of the war game he likes to play and Wellness class all together makes me cry. And I had to get my schedule all changed around again because I know that I would have cried trying to go to Current Events knowing that he was supposed to be in that class with me. It all just makes me wants to crawl up in a little ball and cry forever and never stop. But now onto a happy note. On the 9th though I was so upset I cried in Wellness class and during lunch. It was my first day back since the bombfest as its being called. I skipped a day to spend it with Justin because I wanted him to know how much I love him and stuff. But anyway that night Justin got me soooo extremely high. We went in his bedroom and used the little soda can bowl Cindy made from a Pepsi can and he got me so high. It was so fun! Justin is like so calm when he's high and I get all talkity when I am I guess. I started to tell him my whole history with guys and I only got up to Steven. I kept forgetting what I had said and stuff. At one point he gave me a cigarette and I didn't remember to light it and then when I did remember I couldn't stop laughing long enough to light it. He taught me how to swing golf clubs that night too and told me to take diet pills to get skinny cause I was complaining that I was gonna die a fat old lady alone with my cats and a virgin for life. Then ya know what he said to me? Do ya? He said that if I was still a virgin at 30 he would quote "fuck the shit out of me" ewww he is such a romantic huh? Anyways somehow that night in my head I figured out that that was only 7 years away and I could probably wait that long. I didn't even realize until like 2 days later that 30 - 18 is 12 not 7 where the hell did I get 7? Also that night at one point Franklin was all crawling up Justin's legs and Franklin has fleas so Justin was all like "Get the fuck off me" and I started laughing and I go "I thought you were talking to me" and he goes "I was" and I go "oh" and he goes "I was joking, I was talking to the dog" OHMYGOD it was so funny. He really reminds me of someone when he's all high and I can't remember who it is. He is so adorable when he's stoned cause his eyes get big and glaze over so he has this like shin to them. It is just so beyond adorable. This other time that night he goes "Where's Franklin?" and I go "In between my legs" because his leash went through my legs and he was under my chair and Justin says something like "Well your not a virgin anymore" and then later I thought I saw someone walk by and then he goes "Hey Tiffy somebody is walking by" and I go "where?" and he goes "Why are you so paranoid?" lol The next day I bought him a 20 bag for his birthday and he was supposed to like smoke it with me and he did but It didn't get me very high. This was the day I met Brett. Brett totally reminds me of Justin. He is all cocky and shit just like Justin. He flirts with me just like Justin used to and he also reminds me of JP and Kevin and Travis. I told Brett about how I like Justin and Justin doesn't like me and Brett goes "What's not to like?" and I go "I'm fat!" That has to be it because It can't be my personality. I mean we're friends he has to like my personality to be my friend and I'm pretty too. It's not like I'm fat and ugly. God I would have killed myself long ago for pete's sake. Kevin came back for Justin's birthday party. He is really a lot taller now. At one point they were all playing hackysack in the yard and it was just like old times when Justin and Kevin and Kyle would play hackysack with Josh Terio or Steve-O. I almost started crying then too. The night Kevin came back was the night of the Paranoid Social Club concert and there were so many people there. Katie Sherman and Ryan, Cora, Erin, Becca, Canada, Ridge, Megan and Ari Reidyke, Robyn and her brother, Jessica Gurney, and Sk8er Mike were all there. Justyn Gifford's band 7Even played, So Justyn and Matt Campbell and Danny Gilbert were there too. N-E-Ways Becca and Cora were sleeping over after and Cora brought a joint. On the way home we met up with Karma and Newcomb and we smoked with them and Becca was all flirting with Newcomb and we went up to my yard and got my bois from Justin's and Karma was all "Justin what's your problem man?" all seriously and shit but thank God it was only a joke because if he tried to hit Justin or something I would have killed him. Then Karma and Newcomb left and Becca started flirting with Justin. They all put their chairs in a circle and Becca sat right in the middle facing Justin's lap and she started playing with the chain to his wallet and flirting with him and it really pissed me off because she knows how I feel about him. They were all high too! I don't really remember anything else until Karma and Newcomb showed back up and we packed another bowl without my bois cause they were stoned enough. Then we took a walk down to Guido's. Then Chris walked us back up to my house and Becca was all flirting with him but I guess Cora liked him so she got all jealous so we went in and fell asleep. We woke up the next day around ten or so and Becca went home. Then me and Cora hung out with my bois and Newcomb showed up and Justin I guess went to get Guido and Karma and Cassie showed up and I was the only one with any money so I had to buy the weed. I had to share with like ten people. That I decided was the last time I was gonna spend money for weed for a good long while $42 dollars in like 3 days. That's pathetic! Oh and Cora likes Justin too damn it! Later the same day of Justin's party I met Kelsey I guess I met her before but I didn't really know who she was or anything. She says she's 14 but she acts 12 and everyone says she's 12 and she goes to St. Augistine. She comes over pretending she's my friend and really all she wants is Justin and it makes me so mad!!!!! I told her how I feel about him and I guess she doesn't care cause she still all flirts with him and shit! ERRRRR!!!! I went in to harder details in my Tinkerbelle diary about exactly why I hate her but this entry is long enough all ready and I still have more to write. The next day after school I went strait to sleep so I didn't get to see Justin till late when I woke up I went over and he wasn't home so I went over later to tell him to call Michaela and they were talking about having babies together and I guess Justin's Mom wants to have the first baby but Justin says she only can have it if it's a girl. Justin's Mom goes "we need to find you a nice boy Tiffany" and I go "But you don't have any other sons" and she goes "what about Kevin? Kevin's a nice boy but he's a little young" and I go "but so is Justin" and he goes "Oh two years, big difference" like how do I explain this....it was like he was saying our age difference is no big deal.... Like we could date...I don't know it was like he was sticking up for the relationship we could have. Anyway I thought it was pretty cool. Also I realized that Justin is my Dawson. We are best friends and I have a crush on him (too bad he doesn't like me back like Dawson does Joey) and she yells at him for liking other girls even though their not dating just like I do to Justin even though we're not dating. My life is a TV show! Is anybody even still reading this??? so the next day I remember is Friday I went down to the Edge and as me and Monica were walking to my house we ran into Erin and then Becca was dropped off and Erin bought a couple joints from Tony through Ray and we went up into the trees to smoke them and we got the munchies so me and Erin and Becca went to Hannaford's and I stole a bunch of chocolate and a bottle of soda. Then we went up to my house and got Justin and we walked Becca back downtown to catch her ride and then Erin and me walked back up to the church to catch her ride. We had left Justin down at Guido's and Becca on the corner by Ray so that we wouldn't miss Erin's ride. Then I went and sat on the steps where Clement used to live to wait for Justin and walked home with him. Saturday Justin made out with 3 girls. Some girl named Sarah, some girl named Crystal and Shannon. Shannon tried to tell me that Justin was an asshole and I should get over him and stuff cause he was a jerk yet she made out with him that same night. That really pisses me off! Later I went over there to tell Justin that I was going to the Kid Rock concert and he asked to barrow $5 to play poker and because I'm a sucker and gullible and so in love with him I lent him the money and he lost it. While he was next door playing poker and getting fucked up on alcohol, pot and coladapins I watched Kyle and Brett playing video games for two hours. When Justin did come back he was such an asshole. He said some really mean stuff to all of us and one particular thing made me tear up but I'm not gonna write it down on here. He was just a jerk and it made me sad. I had to leave and he didn't even hug me good-bye. Sunday Brett borrowed $5 because he was all depressed and wanted to get high. Justin had to baby-sit for this Tina girl while she went to the Kid Rock concert. I walked up there with him then down to Kyle's sister's to hang out with Brett and Kyle. Then Kyle went to check to see if they had left yet and I was left with Brett at Abbots and then we went back to Kyle's sister's and then they both went up to check on Justin and I went home. Then I guess that girl hadn't left still so they walked back down to Justin's and Kelsey showed up and Brett goes to Kelsey "are you my friend?" and she goes "uh...sure" and he goes "are you my bud with benefits?" and Kelsey goes "Uh...no!" and he goes "That's, OK Tiffany's my bud with benefits. She's my sex Dalmatian" lol what the hell! Was that a diss or what?? He didn't say it like a diss but Dalmatian's are dogs. lol anyway it was funny. I think I like Brett now by the way. I told Kelsey this so guess what, now she likes Brett too. Errrrr! They all walked me over to the church to get my ride to the concert with Jaylyn. The first band was called Whitestarr and they kinda sucked. But Kid Rock was awesome. I fell asleep during Whitestarr, lol it was funny. Monday I didn't go to school cause I stayed up too late on the com and doing homework. After school Michaela and Kelsey came over and we went up to Kyle's sister's and when it was time to leave Justin was hugging Kelsey good-bye and grabbed her ass and then he kissed Michael twice (she says four time but I only saw 2 times) and she had a boyfriend at the time. Then we walked down to my house and waited for Michaela's ride and her brother took so long that Justin showed up and he kissed her again before she left and ya know what she did after, she wiped her mouth and spit lol. I told her!!!! lmfao!! After she left Kelsey did too and I went down the street and Justin was out on his porch smoking a cigerette and we started talking about how she wiped away his kiss and I got "I told her so" and he goes "You told her what? What did you tell her?" and I go "whoops nothing" It was funny he caught me sorta. He asked me to help him do the dishes and he kissed me on the cheek to get me to help. It was so sweet. And some other stuff happened (nothing dirty) that I don't want to put up on here but basically he told me I wasn't ugly that night too. He didn't say I was beautiful or anything but he said I wasn't ugly! OK finally now today he started work and I saw him for all of 2 minuets but that's OK cause Kelsey and Michael didn't see him at all. Haha! lucky me. I have been working on this entry for four day and I am finally done yay!